Scheduling my day , trying to decide what needs to be done. For anything involving my computer, like this, for example, reading or even driving, I have to do it 30 min at a time. My life feels like one long to do page, having to stand and move around so I don’t fall asleep. Can’t go anywhere over 30 min away. Can’t read any of the many, many, books I still want to read, unless it’s night and it’s ok to fall asleep.
Once I fall asleep and jolt awake again, I can try and try to get back my energy but it is gone for good for that day.
Is it horrible, yes it is. Is it a severe pain and makes me just want to cry the tears from all the way down in to my toes, yes, yes it does.
Living 30 minutes at a time
Can not sit , and let my mind go
Can not jump in the car and drive anywhere just because
I love to learn and I love to read
I loved when I used to feel more free
Now if I sit to long it sucks away my living
If I am up to long and do to much
I usually will have a price of pain to pay
Which way is up , which way is down
To be living instead of just surviving