Posted in Uncategorized

2017

Posted on by queentracey1

Life has been rough on me, not having a close family, fire, abuse, alcoholism,all of it has made me who I am today. I want so much more out of life. I want to live!!! Not just survive, I started the changes I thought necessary to accomplish this, then life hit again. So, now it’s time to suck it up and start again. 

Back, Forward and Back again. 

Start 2. 

I have an amazing new man in my life. My son is doing cna courses and wants to be a dr. 

I have a lot of good things as well. 

Maybe this time I will accomplish my goal. 

GO ME!!!! Lol

Posted in my thoughts, Parents, photography, Uncategorized

And then he kissed me……

Posted on by queentracey1

I have been through more then I feel I deserve and more than most could handle. I do believe everything happens for a reason but our lives are what we make of them. Some of you have been with me through enough to know what I mean. I am not sure if I have ever really known love, not motherly, not friendly but true knock your socks off love. 

In the beginning… lol. Had to do it… anyway. We all think in the first few months of a new relationship that they could be the one, we are soooo in love. Then for most people reality sets in and u still like what you have or not. 

Maybe it is when u least expect it. Maybe it is when u stop looking. Maybe, who knows. 

I knew him years ago when I dated his cousin. We started messaging back and forth, I wasn’t going to let him in. I was happy having a new friend to talk to. I cleaned out my friends sometime ago. 

I have been going on and on about changing myself for the better in the last what, 6 months or so, we have been Back, Forward and Back Again. I have been not only decluttering in my house but myself as well. I have had setbacks, was robbed, depressed, and then the holidays. 

Out of it I kept thinking, new years will b the start. I will start again on new years. I said, I am taking the jump and changing things. If u stay safe inside and not try anything, well, u don’t know what you could be missing.

I finally decided, it was time to take some chances. 

He said he would pick me up at 5. 

I have to admit I am doing the Googly eyed , swooning over his every word, can he be real, thing. Does he have a playbook on me or something? How does he know the right answers, he brought roses???, (wow). It’s only been 3 days. 3 DAYS!

WHAT HAVE I GOT MYSELF INTO!!! LOLOLOL. 

Posted in my thoughts, Parents, Shared, Uncategorized

Memories

Posted on by queentracey1

Memories are what keep lost time and people alive in our minds and hearts. 

Pictures help memories become more real. 

Things and times we have forgotten become real and alive again. 

Sometimes, I don’t want to remember, sometime the pain that comes with the memory I don’t want, but I have to have the pain to have the memory. 

Pain of a dead weight on your chest burning as it becomes heavier and heavier. The memories rush through you like waves in the ocean. 

Was it worth it now that all we have left is the pain,…..