Anxiety is more of a curse than anything else. You can’t cure it with the perfect medicine, and it doesn’t go away passively like a cold. Anxiety demands your attention, while making you more fearful of giving it your attention the closer you look at it. But deep down, defeating anxiety consists of taking part […]
via 10 mindful attitudes that rewire your brain to let go of anxiety — SOMEONE SOMEWHERE
I look at the other blogs I find and follow and see so much wisdom and beauty in pictures and words and also so much pain. I feel like a sponge always searching for more to absorb in self- health, metal and emotional health and sometimes I have so much to say that I can not say a word.
I have lived through every kind of abuse as I climbed up the ladder to mental health. I have had a “normal” childhood but found myself one screwed up person. I have grandkids who deserve so much better than what they have and live each day knowing to save them I would have to loose them due to my health not being good enough to care for them myself. But, is that just what I tell myself? Is it really me using my health as a crutch? Is my health even as bad as I think it is or have I just convinced myself it is?
I procrastinate like crazy, I would even say I am lazy. At times I do nothing and accomplish nothing in my day. My life changed completely finding my soulmate and he loves me as I am. He works his butt off to give me all he thinks I should have. I have survived but never actually lived. I was a hobbit only leaving my house when I had to, but was it because I was just to lazy to take a shower and care to a point about my appearance? I did this for years, I mean like ten years of wasted life.
I have so much to explore in mental health still. I know we can never stop growing inside and have found I actually enjoy psychology and reading about just how we work as people.
I also have piles of stuff and pages of ideas of things I want to make and create. My house is still not together yet. We are always working on it. At this time I have no kitchen. So much but at the same time nothing.
This is me today.
4 CLASSES FOR DESIGNER THAT YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS
https://academyofskill.wordpress.com/2018/02/07/4-classes-for-designer-that-you-dont-want-to-miss/
The year 2017 was the best ever for me and I can not even begin to see how I can top it!
I found my soul mate and married him so he couldn’t get away! Lol We bought a house, moved my whole family a half hour away to a different town and into the country.
I was told I had cancer, and I beat it! I have worked on my eating and exercise habits, or trying to be habits and just over all well being, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
I got to see my brother, sister and father for the first time in 18 years, met my nieces and my brother in law.
I have had emotional flows of happiness so strong it brings me to tears, all I have ever wanted and wished for I found with one man, who I ignored 25 years ago when we first met, but I wasn’t ready to receive his love at that time. We both had to indulge in the cruelty of human nature, sacrifice all that we were and then rebuild better and stronger first because only then, only when you can love yourself , be proud of who you are, are you able to fully accept someone’s gift of unconditional beauty and magical happiness that is true love.
I never thought I would find such a beautiful thing in this world so filled with hate and violence, I always thought my sins as a teenager had deemed me unworthy and went to far at trying to make up for it by letting people take advantage of my help many times till I realized that also was not right. I needed to just be me, deal with the punches as they came and live my life as it was. 42 years for me to be broken completely, stumble blindly for awhile trying to find the right path and start over to form the mother, friend, and woma, and now wife I wanted to be.
To me marriage is sacred and never ending. Divorce is not in my vocabulary with exception of cheating and violence, marriage is something you put 100% of yourself into and then find more. You are no longer one person but an ever evolving unit always in perfect stride with each other.
In writing my vows I somehow got to bible verses and found the story of god making woman. In the version I read it said he made Adam feel the need for a mate first and then he took, not from Adams feet for him to walk on her, not from Adams head for her to rule over him but from his side for him to understand they were equals. This even now I’m crying because it hits home so hard for us, I was always walked on and treated like I was nothing and David’s exwife ruled over him in his prior marriage and was controlling, so as you see, it just had to be.
so now as I say goodbye to 2017 I can not imagine what is in store for me in 2018 but having the love of my life by my side will make it nothing we can’t handle together.
clickandgrow.com/pages/sg9-launch?refCode=5642080382615552
Our smart indoor gardens take care of plants automatically by making sure that they have enough water, light and nutrients at all times.
We have over 45 different plants to choose from.
so this is a click and earn site.
if you sign up and get ten friends to sign up then you get a free 3 pack plant garden
and so on and so on, I have read the information and the blog seems really legit so, Click and Grow with me!!!
It’s been a while but finally I’ve managed to squeeze in an embroidery make – a sneaky bit of blackw… – http://wp.me/p5i1ln-xj
Join me on Skillshare an online site were you can learn to do just about anything in short 15 min classes or hour class. Different subjects like Harley Davidson repairs to watercolors to websites to photography to………… It just goes on and on
http://skl.sh/2ge3WhS just click this link to get there quick.
