my thoughts, Psychology, self-help, Uncategorized

I just can’t loose weight


I was a size 6-8 my whole life until about 15 years ago. I was diagnosed with Addison’s disease when I was 22, this was 8 years later. I am ashamed to say I weigh 202. Pounds and I feel disgusting. I have physical limitations that I do not fully understand the reason for, I have fibromyalgia, ok, I have arthritis, ok, but I have a swelling in my hip and “tire” area no doctor has been able to explain! That was when I started limiting my activity and started to gain weight. I just figured out I can not have dairy and thought that would be it, but, nope. It is not my bones, we know that for sure. I think it has something to do with air, I can get a lot of gas sometimes after the swelling comes but it is so severe I look crooked! It is visible to anyone that one side is bigger, it has always been the left side. If I am physically active when it is already swollen, it gets worse and can hurt all the way down my leg. Everyone just says,” there is nothing there”? Yup, just my hip. But it swells. My dr said to “get regular ” but I have never been!!

So, I need to loose weight. I hate the way I look. But I just can’t fig out how with limited mobility. My dr has suggested water physical therapy. I just feel like it is hopeless. Of course my husband loves me and always gets upset when I say I am fat or something, says he still sees the 15 year old girl he met but, he will see it someday.

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my thoughts, Parents, Psychology, self-help

I am DONE being an addict


For 12 years, maybe 15 I have been doing suboxen because I became addicted to opioids. I have health issues and they told me all the time, (the dr’s )that my body could not handle detox that it would kill me. I died the day I did my first drug. I am tired of it, I don’t want to do this anymore.

I can’t keep dealing with the shame of being an addict. My husband has never even hit a joint! For real! He doesn’t understand at all but he is trying. I cut down to 2 mg months ago and for the past two day I have been doing one. It is not in my head, the lack of energy, the lack of motivation, I also have more pain than normal but I can think that away with the weather. I have to trick myself into not being affected by this. I need to know what it is like to feel normal, but with my Addison’s I won’t ever, so how normal can I get?

I need to sleep. I’m so tired. Igo through fazes of not sleeping and last night I woke up and could not go back to sleep and I need to sleep. I am supposed to get 10-12 hours with my illnesses. I have to break that now before it really starts or it will be so much harder .

My son, the pre Med one, he knows all about it and he just says, mom who cares, u r not an addict, I think you should just leave it alone. But, I still feel it. I want so bad to change. I need to not have soo many regrets and not wish I had done this and that. I will not be ever to just travel if I am still on this crap. I will accomplish one big thing in my life besides my kids, even if it is the only think I ever do.

Laws of attraction, God, Angels, the universe, which ever one you believe in, please help me. Please.

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Psychology, self-help, Shared, tips & tricks, Uncategorized, WOW Stuff

Stop Apologizing To Toxic Boyfriends


Stop Apologizing To Toxic Boyfriends

Stop Apologizing To Toxic Boyfriends
— Read on thoughtcatalog.com/holly-riordan/2019/01/stop-apologizing-to-toxic-boyfriends/

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