Posted in my thoughts, organized, tips & tricks, Uncategorized, WOW Stuff

Someday


Someday

Oh today I am all about someday!

I want, to have half less stuff, to continue having this wonderful man in my life, to have my health get better or at least not get worse.  I want to also come up with a stable income next to my child support, so when someday comes that the house is built enough to live in , we can move in and me not feel like I don’t contribute enough to pull my son’s and my weight.

Even thou cook, housekeeper, and companion is worth something!!! Maybe I should figure out how much that would be worth. lol. oh boy.

Someday my dreams will come true. I already feel like I have met my soul mate even if it has been only 6 weeks.

It’s amazing how much motivation finding someone who gets you can be.

Posted in my thoughts, Parents, photography, Uncategorized

And then he kissed me……


I have been through more then I feel I deserve and more than most could handle. I do believe everything happens for a reason but our lives are what we make of them. Some of you have been with me through enough to know what I mean. I am not sure if I have ever really known love, not motherly, not friendly but true knock your socks off love. 

In the beginning… lol. Had to do it… anyway. We all think in the first few months of a new relationship that they could be the one, we are soooo in love. Then for most people reality sets in and u still like what you have or not. 

Maybe it is when u least expect it. Maybe it is when u stop looking. Maybe, who knows. 

I knew him years ago when I dated his cousin. We started messaging back and forth, I wasn’t going to let him in. I was happy having a new friend to talk to. I cleaned out my friends sometime ago. 

I have been going on and on about changing myself for the better in the last what, 6 months or so, we have been Back, Forward and Back Again. I have been not only decluttering in my house but myself as well. I have had setbacks, was robbed, depressed, and then the holidays. 

Out of it I kept thinking, new years will b the start. I will start again on new years. I said, I am taking the jump and changing things. If u stay safe inside and not try anything, well, u don’t know what you could be missing.

I finally decided, it was time to take some chances. 

He said he would pick me up at 5. 

I have to admit I am doing the Googly eyed , swooning over his every word, can he be real, thing. Does he have a playbook on me or something? How does he know the right answers, he brought roses???, (wow). It’s only been 3 days. 3 DAYS!

WHAT HAVE I GOT MYSELF INTO!!! LOLOLOL. 

Posted in my thoughts, Parents, Shared, Uncategorized

Memories


Memories are what keep lost time and people alive in our minds and hearts. 

Pictures help memories become more real. 

Things and times we have forgotten become real and alive again. 

Sometimes, I don’t want to remember, sometime the pain that comes with the memory I don’t want, but I have to have the pain to have the memory. 

Pain of a dead weight on your chest burning as it becomes heavier and heavier. The memories rush through you like waves in the ocean. 

Was it worth it now that all we have left is the pain,…..

Posted in kids and crafts and more!!!, my thoughts, organized, Reviews, Shared, tips & tricks, Uncategorized

Who are you?


Who do you want to be?? I don’t mean mother, I don’t mean wife, what kind of, woman or man do you want to be???

One answer was from a woman who said she wanted to be worldly….

I started thinking and have not stopped. Adventuress ,  worldly, a leader, ……

I do not even know who I am nevermind who I want to be…

Lost, confused ,  totally unorganized 

That’s what my whole life revolves around, being unorganized ,  my thoughts, my projects, my house…..

Posted in My Photos of Maine, organized, Parents, Reviews, Shared, tips & tricks, WOW Stuff

Challenge!!!!!


 “Imagine how powerful and how visible our world would change if everyone kept just one more promise each day, week, month, or year.” – Manish

Although I may not know who he is, he has a point.

My Challenge, should you choose to except it, 

Do one thing extra, everyday till Xmas to help someone, keep a promise or just do that thing you said you would do and haven’t done it yet????

I do it, Because I Said I Would……

Now of course I have no way to keep track or check to see who’s actually doing it but, I figure I will post what I did that day, and you can comment with yours!!!! 

So, Is anyone up for the challenge????


Posted in Parents

Trying to survive 


I know I really have no close family. I have friends but honestly most are to busy in there own lives to even call unless they need something. I always had my boys but now one is gone and the other hardly comes out of his room. I know I’m depressed and I crave adult companionship. The changes I have been trying to make have been up and down and I keep thinking how I’m not living. I’m just surviving. 

I do what I can to take my mind off stuff. I decided today would just b a create stuff day. I am doing three different projects at once, and I’m still lonely.

My son didn’t come home today. I miss him so much. My other son is confusing. I know he doesn’t know who he is yet but, he does not care when I get upset, he does not care when I ask him to go with me somewhere so I’m not going alone, he says no. I wanted to go to a corn maze we had free tickets for, I have never been but since it was just him and I he said no. I’m glad he’s independent but at the same time he keeps his room so bad. Dirty dishes, empty food containers and getting him to clean is horrible. 

So, is it just another day? No, it’s worse. 

Posted in WOW Stuff

Forgive for Good


By Dr. Fred Luskin

         The Nine Steps

1. Know exactly how you feel, figure out what about the situation was not ok and then talk to a couple trusted people.

2. Make a commitment to yourself to feel better. Forgiveness is for you and no one else.

3. Forgiving is not saying it is ok to do or treat me like this and it does not mean continuing your relationship with that person. Forgiveness is taking things less personal and being less offended by them by seeking peace and understanding.

4. Recognize you are upset because of how you feel now not how you felt when you were hurt when it happened.

5. When you feel upset, practice stress management to soothe the fight or flight response.

6. Remember, you can only hope for health, love and prosperity. You can work hard to get them but people do not have to give them to you and you can not force it. If you expect them you can easily be disappointed and suffer.

7. Try other ways to reach your goals instead of continuing the way you were hurt.

8. Remember having a life well lived is your best revenge. If you focus on the pain they caused, you give them the power over you. Focus on the love, beauty and kindness you have in your life instead of what you don’t have. 

9. Look at your past and remember your choice to forgive.

Posted in my thoughts, Parents, Shared, WOW Stuff

Countries 


​I’m going to italy. To live. I’m watching a show, the way they work, the way they get paid. They have the longest life expectancy. They get paid to honeymoon. They get paid so much differently. The company treats the workers as they deserve to b treated. 2 hr lunches. They say it’s important to make the workers happy. They dropped there mouth when they found out there is no paid vacation time by law. 8 weeks vacation to get married, 5 months paid to raise new baby, wow. It just keeps going. We don’t take enough vacations. The us and Italy produce about the same but we work twice as much!! The Italians have more vacations to enjoy life. They believe people need to be happy!! Wow.

Next

The French teach children how to eat healthy from day one in school. They get 5 course meals and have 1 hour lunch that is just like a class. The kids looked at pics of us kids school meals and they said those poor kids. The chef at the school spends less but the kids eat way better.
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In Germany they have free collage, they work 36 hours but get paid 40. If a worker feels stressed they get a 3 week stay at a spa. Nobody knows anything about a 2nd or 3rd job. They also believe to have good work then you need happy workers and this is all from a place that makes pencils.Oh my. It’s against the law to contact employees on vacation or after work hours. This is still germany. This show is called Were to invade next, on epix2. I’m awed at seeing how other countries do things so different and the people r so into living life to live!! But they think America is the place to be, not so much anymore. Tons of American students go out of country to get free school. They have plaques outside each house to name the Jewish family that lived there. They believe germany needs to remember there past so they can change the future.
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Finland kids go to school 3 or 4 hours and yet do better. No multiple choice, they just no the answer. Wow. They go about education so much better. The us only cares about the standard testing. None of the schools are different. No paying to go to school, no privite schools. They all go together. The us has made schools a business.
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In Portugal,  using drugs of any kind is not illegal.Human dignity is above all else, that’s what the police in Portugal are taught.

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Norway has the lowest murder rate but they don’t do death penalty and they don’t need guns because the prisoners are treated w something they say they stole from our Constitution,  no cruel or unusual punishment. They do not lower themselves to the criminals to think they have the right to treat anyone cruel. They send them to prison and show them, love. They have less than a 20% rearrest rate!! The hardent prison on the outside looks like ours but inside, wow. They again, don’t use guns. no fights, no rape, no stabbings, nothing. The prisoners loose the freedom but are still human beings. It works. 

I never do anything political. I don’t get into any of these things usually I change the channel but this is all blowing my mind. How has America changed from love to so much hate.

It almost makes me ashamed of how we have become. The US is supposed to be the country of dreams and the country every wants to run to, why?. our crime is high, our majority rate of criminals returning is high, our education is low, our workers are not happy, we have high welfare, no free health care, we have low and middle classes. All of these countries doing these things and got the ideas from us!!!! But we don’t use them. I wish Donald Trump could see this show. We are not the land of opportunity ,  we tell our kids they can be anything they want but they cant. In America it is I, in the other countries it is we, our, always looking at things as equals. 

I am disappointed.